Pro Party 🎉

Lawyer Dude ® for President

Pro Party Policy

Make Hurricanes Illegal to Hit Us

Daytona Beach has had enough, and so has Lawyer Dude ®. The Pro Party is officially making arrangements for hurricanes to hold stationary 1000 miles off the coast for weeks at a time. That’s right—no more floody interruptions (only skipping work interruptions). Lawyer Dude ® is currently negotiating the hurricane policy with Mother Nature. There is some trading going so Canada might have a really cold winter. But, for us, it’s time to let the sunshine reign and keep the good times rolling!

Unlimited Happy Hours

Why limit a good time? Lawyer Dude ® will make happy hour 24/7 across all of Daytona Beach. From brunch mimosas to midnight mojitos, it’s always happy hour when you’re in the Pro Party.

Ban Sunburns for Good

It’s time to protect our skin—and our fun. Lawyer Dude ® promises to outlaw sunburns once and for all. No more awkward tan lines or painful peeling, just endless beach days without the sting!

Will Fight For Your Rights...To Party

Every American has the unalienable right to let loose, kick back, and enjoy some good vibes. That’s why Lawyer Dude ® is leading the charge to protect your right to party—whether it’s on the beach, at the backyard BBQ, or the annual office shindig. We’re talking 24/7 good times, baby. The Pro Party stands for freedom—freedom to crank up the music, bust out your best dance moves, and stay out past bedtime.

You Can Wear Sunglasses at Night

The Lawyer Dude ® says, why let the sun dictate your style? Day or night, sunglasses are always in. Whether you’re blocking out the haters or just looking cool under the stars, the Pro Party believes in your right to rock those shades 24/7.

Hotdogs Are Not Sandwiches

Let’s settle this once and for all—hotdogs are not sandwiches. Lawyer Dude ® is here to end the debate. A bun, a dog, and some mustard? That’s its own category of greatness. The Pro Party proudly defends hotdog rights everywhere. 

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Disclaimer

PAID JOKE FOR LAWYER DUDE FOR PRESIDENT OF A FICTIONAL PERSONAL INJURY LAWYER UNIVERSE. FULL AGENDA IS AT LAWYERDUDE.COM/PARTY.